Almost 13 years ago I gave birth to what I believed was the most perfect…most beautiful…most amazing creature ever to grace this fair planet with it’s presence….my son Simon. One look into his eyes and I knew I could never love anything more than I did that boy.
But like I said…that was 13 years ago…and that angelic baby is now getting ready to enter junior high…and times have changed.
This 8th wonder of the world is now as tall as I am and his feet are several sizes bigger than mine. A toothless grin has been traded in for a mouth full of braces and smooth skin has been replaced with acne. Listening to him chew has become far less charming and while in days gone by we spent countless hours snuggling in blissful silence on the couch we now spend our time discussing black holes, Minecraft strategies, and the possiblity of writing code using only prime numbers.
When I add all these changes up it can only mean one thing…my son has turned into one of those fantastically awkward teens that I left behind when I said goodbye to my teaching career to stay home and raise this sweet, little, baby boy.
I mean sure, I loved those junior high kids a lot. A whole lot. They were my life but, come on! My precious angel was never going to become one of them!!! They were so wierd and so strange and so so smelly…and while their antics at school entertained me every single day I never intended to have one of those nut jobs living under my roof.
And yet…here we are.
A fact that I realized several months ago and in a moment of clarity decided to embrace it whole heartedly.
That right…I decided to embrace the awkwardness. All of it. Every weirdo beardo minute of it.
And it has been one of the best decision I have ever made.
Sure I have NO IDEA what he is talking about most of the time…but I am listening. And sure I do not understand ANY of what goes on in his lego fight club thing…but I take him to all the meetings and bring treats and make their posters. And even though I don’t sing or dance I went to every single one of his play practices and even made his costume….and then didn’t miss a performance.
This kid of mine…he was only a baby for a small moment and then I blinked and now he is going into junior high. And when I blink again he will be off to college…so while my eyes are wide open I need to take it all in. Every single minute of it…and that includes the mismatched socks, the reminders to shower, and the never ending eating. Luckily it also includes staying up late talking about the universe, rooting him on in new adventures, and watching him discover and develop his strengths.
I know from experience with hours of parent/teacher conferences that most parents try to hold their breath and wait out this unflattering phase of life…but I’m choosing not to do that. I’m going to breath it all in…every stinking, burpy, farty, breath and then hang on for dear life..because I don’t want to miss a single thing.
This child of mine, he is not the same helpless creature that slipped into my arms almost 13 years ago, however one thing is just as true today as it was then…when I look into those eyes, now covered by glasses, I still know I could never love anything more than I love this boy and I still believe with all my heart that he is absolutely amazing.
Oh Simon, you will always have my heart.
LOVE!
Sweet!
So, my son is pretty curious about this Lego fight club…
Very nicely written! Those little ones just grow up way to fast!
What a wise woman you are !! I laugh at new parents who are breathlessly waiting for the first child’s first step. I try and tell these anxious parents, you will be telling that child to be still sooner than you think. My youngest will be a junior in high school in two weeks and my oldest will be a college senior. I wish I could slow time and capture those everyday moments on a video. Those times when you are folding laundry or driving somewhere, those times are when “real talk” happens and you can gain such clear view of what your child is feeling and thinking and hoping for. Staying up to have hot chocolate with a kid who went on a first date is not a missed opportunity for sleep, but hopefully a gift of shared experiences (good or bad ) that you can laugh about when they are older and wiser.
Good Luck and I hope you have many ordinary moments.
ms. sue
OH my gosh! YES! To everything you said! The ordinary moments….that is where the magic is!
I think the official name is Lego League and they have clubs all over the country. They give the kids challenges …one to study an environmental issue and the other is a series of challenges that they need to build and program a robot to complete using computer code, basic motorized parts, and of course legos.
It is a lot of fun. My son has totally enjoyed it!
Beautiful! I will remind myself of this post when my now 5-year old boy is a teenager. Thank you!