“Mom, I need to tell you something….”
That is how the conversation started a couple of weeks ago. And then my teenage son pulled out this cup from behind his back.
“I broke your favorite dish.”
I was in the middle of making dinner, the house was chaotic but I knew that my teenager needed me.
So, I quickly turned off the stove and sat down with him at the stools by the kitchen island.
“It’s okay,” I said.
“You aren’t super mad at me?” he asked.
“Nope. Not at all.”
He then went on to explain that he had broken it but he wanted to take the time to try to fix it….and then he showed me the glue gun burns on his fingers that showed his efforts.
“I promise it’s okay,” I said with a nod.
“Thanks mom, I love you.”
And those last three words were the icing on the cake. The dish mattered nothing at that moment. But my son did. He mattered.
And I am glad I didn’t pass up that moment to nurture a relationship and not ruin it over a broken dish.
~Elizabeth
Such an important reminder/lesson. Thanks for your example!
Do you know Kintsugi ? a japanese way to fix broken things with gold. It’s impossible for everybody, but may be that can inspire to mend with something else. This cup can still have life, as a vase, as a cup for little things…
You act just as Françoise Dolto said you should (she was a psychiatrist specialised in children care).
That is so sweet that he tried fixing it and was brave enough to come tell you what happened. I wish more people could remember to react as you did, there would be so much more confidence and kindness in the world
I am using it to hold my wonder clips in my sewing area….I want to remember this quote 😉
Thanks Emily!
I am keeping the cup to remind myself of this lesson…I am hoping I don’t forget!
Oh, I could cry. So sweet and you are such a great mom.
Thanks Kristin….but I will happily admit that not interactions go like this one….and I am trying to be better.
Well handled, both of you. I got lucky, last time, anyway. My 16-year-old broke my nice ceramic spoon rest. But he’d just taken a pottery class. So he made me a new one. It’s not quite as elegant as the old one, but made with love.