Back in April I wrote this post about mending.
This weekend I thought again about mending…about how sometimes things take longer than planned…about how much we take for granted.
Since writing my last post I’ve “passed off” all that I needed to in my physical therapy…and have started running again.
I have to admit that I cried the first time I went running again.
(I know…I know..it’s ridiculous to cry about running but the more you get to know me the more ridiculous you see that I am.)
So there I am at the gym on the treadmill for the first time in over a year. The conveyor belt starts, my music begins, and I burst into tears.
Big old ugly crying.
The kind with the snot and the weird breathing. Which was compounded by the jogging.
It wasn’t pretty.
But there I was—I was back!
Who cares if all the weight lifters thought I was loosing my mind? I was running and the Carpenter’s were singing!!!!
(Have I mentioned that before I run a race, go on a jog, or begin a training run that I always listen to The Carpenter’s sing “We’ve only just begun”? Well I do. In fact, I don’t think I could run at all without that song to get me started.)
***At this point let me remind you that I stated earlier that I am, in fact, ridiculous. Ok. Let’s move on.***
So I cried to be back.
And then I realized how much ground I’ve lost, how slow I am, and how hard it is going to be to get back to where I once was. And at the end of my time on the treadmill when I looked at the time and the distance I covered I cried a little bit more to know how much work I have ahead of me.
But it was only a few tears because I realized how awesome it is that I just get to run again…
I’m still mending…things aren’t as they once were. I was even back at the hospital again last week.
But mending isn’t always easy or convenient. In sewing or in life.
Tonight I will go running again.
I’ll get myself fixed up. Even if it is slowly, one stitch at a time.
-liZ
PS—Last week was, rough…but I’m back on the mend and have some new sewing projects that I’m wicked excited about coming soon!
PS—I am going to redo my running list. Well, not the whole list. “We’ve Only Just Begun” will always be the first song on my running play list but I could use a few new songs to add into my old mix. Any suggestions?
I’ve gotten some really funny emails this morning about my choice of music…ok, let me clarify: “We’ve Only Just Begin” is always the first song on my play list because I think it is a funny way to start a run…especially if it is a long one. HOWEVER the rest of my play list is not the same genre or tempo as The Carpenters….the rest of my play list is anything goes…although it would be awesome to be some sort of Zen runner that could zoom along while listening to elevator music.
Thanks for the suggestions everyone…keep them coming!
Congrats on getting back to running!! I don’t think it’s silly at all that you got so emotional.
So far I’ve only run with the sounds of nature or the rhythm of my feet on the treadmill. However, I recently ran part of a half marathon next to a woman who had a rockin song set that really did give me an extra kick, so while I still love the quiet I might mix it up with music now and then. I’m looking forward to the suggestions others give.
I can’t remember the songs the woman played, but a band on the race course played ‘I wanna be sedated’ by the Ramones and I loved it!
im so happy and proud of you! your not crazy about crying at all. after my sons birth it took months before i could go outside and walk again. for months each time i went walking i cried every time mostly because i was thankful to be alive but also because i had missed my daily walks and all that they brought. it was the most amazing and overwhelming feeling. im so happy you are able to be back at it and proud of you for not giving up on something you love!
What a great post. Heartfelt, funny, and love the way you relayed it to sewing. You are not crazy but you do make me laugh! Thank you! I don’t listen to music much (I know…) nor do I exercise. I tried our new eliptical a year ago–my ankle swelled up ??? and Dr. said I had sprained it! Finally, I tried it again a month ago–10 minutes–and saw the swelling start. You want to compare notes on “sensitive girl” inside and out? I suggest a good Hall and Oates (have the double hit CD–listen? NO. I prefer silence.)and an Elton John one (Rocket Man?) Good luck on getting back out there!!
This is inspiring…sometimes the things worth doing aren’t easy…but I am inspired by your persistence.
So happy you’re on the mend! I can’t imagine running to the Carpenters (though I love them). Their music isn’t fast enough. My (currently sadly underused) running playlist has Florence + the Machine’s Shake it Off, Phoenix’s Lisztomania and 1901, and a bunch of Muse. And Sexy Back. Because when I’ve got sweat pouring off me and I’m tomato red in the face (no matter what shape I’m in, I get bright red when I run) I’m bringing sexy back.
I also had such a hard time after the birth of my daughter. It was terrible. I never realized it could be that bad! It took months and months to recover. I agree– It’s ok to be emotional!
Definitely add some Queen. Anything from their greatest hits–maybe some “Don’t stop me now” or “I want to break free”. Also add some No Doubt, maybe “I’m just a girl” or “Running”. Their “singles” album is one of my favs as well.
Take On Me, by Aha is a great running song. It has a great tempo. I’m also a fan of corny Mexican pop star, Cristian Castro for running: Azul and Lloviendo Estrellas 🙂
I just got back into running after injuring my back during a 5k this spring and boy is it tough! My selections for running are so varied that it keeps things interesting. However, two of my favorites include Usher’s “Yeah” and almost anything by Lady Gaga. Congrats on getting back to running!
My husband totally agrees with your Queen comment!
I have Lisztomania on my running list too! Great beat, but somehow mellow too.
Rocky theme song and Eye of the Tiger.
Yup. I’m a bit silly too. But for some reason those two songs get me moving!
Congrats on being able to run again.
You’ve only just begun!
~Michelle
Hold It Against Me- Britney!!
Oh my goodness I’m glad you’re on the mend and back at running. Hopefully last week was the last of your hospital visits. I had to quit running b/c of injuries to my ankle (and knee) but I do prefer more upbeat/faster songs like kriss kross jump and stuff that I’m almost embarrassed to admit I listen to like Britney Spears and Black Eyed Peas and Party Rock Anthem.
Oh bless you crying. When I first started running I wanted to run a half marathon to raise money for charity in memory of my mother. Well, that and to keep my occupied from missing her. I started from nowhere too, and the song that always kept me going was Mama Cass, It’s Getting Better. I think it might help you too.